Sunday, July 27, 2008

F@rt jokes????


On the down side, there have been accusations lately that my behavior can be "boorish". On the up side, I have been also been told that I make the missus laugh.
As you may recall, we saw a Jane Austen English manor type movie last week, with gentlemen riding horses and being gentlemanly. HOWEVER, I belong to the category of least gentlemanly men on earth: the husband of many years. The man who has been married for many years is not a tidy dresser, and may not give warning before he belches. Ah ha! There it is: she wants warning before I belch, but really, is such a thing always possible?
Perhaps a single guy trying to impress a hot woman like my wife would be more polite around the house, or, and this is my theory, a gay man would dress in something other than flannel shirts and jeans, plus have superior manners. Probably a gay man would be a better house keeper than me, too.

I explain my theories to my wife, that since I am not a gay man, she can expect slovenly, messy, yet cheerful behavior from me. Because if I was gay, she would not be so fortunate as to be married to me.

3 comments:

Tink said...

I only want warning before farts. Burps are fine, as long as they're not aimed at my face. Hoop only did that once. Never again.

kcinnova said...

I was dressed in flannel shirt and jeans when I met my future inlaws. Just sayin'.

gary rith said...

I consider myself prime husband material, burps and all.
It is a bit of a problem in summer though, because I like seltzer mixed with lemonade and drink a lot of it. Seltzer, of course, is very bubbly and gaseous and provides a very pleasant and satisfying burp.